All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
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