He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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