so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
The uberlube is also flammable
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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