he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize