I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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