I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
