well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize