So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
