Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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