Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
we're making bets on your personal life
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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