apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
