Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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