Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize