You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
my liver is dry heaving
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
