It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize