he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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