try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
