my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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