Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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