all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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