so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
