My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
