Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
We had sex on a dog bed..
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
