I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
