IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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