New low: just hacked my moms facebook
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
