Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
