Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize