hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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