p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
