It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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