i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
