My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
