How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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