Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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