A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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