Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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