You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I just cut my nipple shaving
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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