Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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