You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
