I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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