Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Randomize
