? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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