Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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