pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
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