I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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