I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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