i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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