Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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