sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
