maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
