If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize